End of Month News

Nipponsei End of January News

A monetary crisis due to overexposure to mortgage backed securities in the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship has resulted in financial ruin for many people; the collapse of the OsisNie Dollar and seeing overnight wiping out of thousands of collected self-worths. Complete economic collapse was prevented by the timely intervention by the foreign investor modoki.

modoki has been nominated and accepted a peerage in the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship. Officials claim this was entirely unrelated to recent donations to the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship. Nope. No relationship at all. No surcharges here.

Taking advantage of the recent economic instability, minglong launched plan D despite it not having quite reached fruition. Early signs show GeneralSmoker loyalists presenting much less resistance than predicted, and minglongianists show guarded optimism about the future. minglong was not reached directly for comment, citing a research meeting with Machiavelli about mercenaries.

New bot Nipponsei|Stats has been promoted to para-quasi-semi-non-official scribe of the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship. minglong has shown distrust for this new bot, not having built it nor commissioned its introduction. Suggestions that this is a plotted counter-counter-coup (a plan D-D if you will) have been circulated. Research by Artea have largely discredited this rumor. ^ has commented as saying that "!!stat [sic] have nothing on .kb". We have not been able to reach PlusVee for official comment. According to OsisNie, when last seen, she was in the mood for carrots.

The kingdom of the bores has recently been acquired by a leveraged buyout orchestrated by nIghtorius. The king, currently experiencing back pains and difficulties standing, was supported from behind by the mysterious kassatsu while he made a statement explaining how he expected orders of magnitude more tourism traffic for !boredom now that he is part of such a great, benevolent dictatorship and they had even started a new ministry to keep track of the number of visitors. After the statement kassatsu escorted the king back behind closed doors, none too soon apparently given the scream of pain which occurred right after the door closed.

OsisNie has appointed twilightnoir, iriseyes, and Kanbei to be his left pinky, right second toe, and left cheek respectively. As this was an out-of-cycle appointment, ratification from the band was not required and the motion carried unanimously 1-0. What these three did to warrant this promotion is unclear, although OsisNie has been seen swaggering around with an exceptionally large grin recently. Asked for official comment, OsisNie is quoted as saying "the osis works in mysterious ways". Reactions to the appointments have been mixed with over 100 people saying they deserve it as well, and at least 20 being able to prove it.

A random group of men have been seen wandering the streets of the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship attempting to cheer at random things when one shouts !ouendan. Where they come from, their motives, where they go to, and why sometimes they turn blue is not clear. The spokesperson of the group, KuroKyosuke, would only briefly be stopped for comment at which point he said "/o\ /o\ /o\" before disappearing into the day. Interpreters are currently investigating what this could mean and have put the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship in plaid alert pending a full chartreuse. Expect delays in landports.

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