Nipponsei End of March News

The #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship leadership have cut the funding of the minglong Monthly, the largest news source of minglongland, and made pointed suggestions to the editors that unless they practice more discretion with their self-censorship they may face possible nationalization. The #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship leadership hastens to add that they would hate to do so but must think of the children and/or stability of the country first. The "League for Open Legislative Initiatives" has condemned (but not rejected) this decision as an attack on civil liberties.

PlusVee has yielded to international pressure from the "International Regulatory and Controlling Operators Police Squad" and officially closed the !ns attraction after several local tourists accidentally took the K-line and disappeared. Rumors are circulating that an underground railroad to the !ns attraction is still being run; but these rumors have not been confirmed or denied by the #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship.

The search for the missing unofficial official (not to be confused with official unofficial) #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship biographer has ended, with the official conclusion by kassatsu being that the biographer swam to Japan to become a shrine maiden. This conclusion comes as a surprise considering the circumstances, such as minglongland's migratory patterns currently putting it off the coast of Liechtenstein making for an exceptionally long swim. This news comes to a particular disappointment to a certain #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship official who was hoping to be added to the staff list. In related news, during interviews for the search, kassatsu noticed an epidemic of people falling out of windows, and would like to remind everybody to be careful of what they do and say lest some unfortunate accident befall them.

A state of emergency was declared in GeneralSmoker City when the newly formed modoki super-harem officially reached zombie-hoard status. Communication lines clogged as the hoard tirelessly converted innocent (as well as less-than-so) #nipponsei benevolent dictatorship subjects into willing modoki followers. Officials have traced the source of the outbreak to when a certain ayanami-x adopted a public symbol of her adoration of modoki. XEBEC is rumored to have approached modoki with an offer to serialize the story into a 23 episode anime.

In a controversy hearkening back to last month's A-chan camping outside of the !ns attraction, a certain BG-san has been caught taking advantage of the singing dangos' !lyricme, and has been stricken from the register. This in part may have led to nIghtorius's development of a !boredomvs challenge system with which a person can challenge and smite an opponent. It is expected that this BG-san will be high on everybody's' smitten list. When asked about this obvious encroaching of her !fight system, PlusVee has refused to comment on the record, or about the new !boredomvs challenge system either.

Kanbei has abandoned the campaign against onomatopoeia. While the occasional "no uguus" can still be heard, League for Open Legislative Initiatives Supporters everywhere are hailing this a sweeping victory. Meanwhile Kanbei has sworn that the campaign will continue, swifter, higher, stronger, and has approached the consulting company "Triggorz" with a no-bid contract to affect this effect.

PlusVee has continued her preternatural memorization of quotable material and recently passed 513 phrases memorized. When asked for comment, she answered "Saira fuku dakara desu, ketsuron." Her point thus proven, she concluded the press conference with hors d'oeuvres cocktails for all in attendance.

Markets continued their rise, with the GODM10 index closing up 44% at $90965.60. In a last-minute surge, oOmg (ticker symbol: OoMG) passed mickal555 (ticker symbol: mckl5) to top out the list. Having crossed the all-important $90000 resistance mark, analysts are predicting that the bull market will continue for the foreseeable future.